FOOTLOOSE: In protest mode

In protest mode
By Derek Almeida


Some time back former GCCI president Nitin Konkolienkar said that “protests” had become an industry in Goa. I never took him seriously until I bumped into my friend Ram Vilas. He was on his way to the Majestic Hotel with a placard which read, “Say no to casinos.”

“Arre bhai, when did you join the protest brigade?” I asked him.

“Derekji, good to see you,” he gushed, “I am now pucca Goan. I learning to protest just like you. You know, long time I am thinking to start new business …..”

“What happened to your tandoori chicken restaurant?” I asked.

“Wife is looking after restaurant, so, I thought I will start new business,” he explained. “First I am giving lots of thought. Then after having some pegs of feni, I am giving more though, but not like first time. Then I am getting some inspiration like tiny drops and suddenly my tube light is working, and I get idea to start NGO and launch protest. Hopefully, in two years I will get office in Panjim if I can make big nuisance for government.” Ram Vilas grinned while I stood there stunned over how this little man had progressed.

“If you are here and your wife is in the restaurant who looks after the children?” I asked with concern.

“Children growing by self Derekji, no tension,” he replied.

Ten day later I found Ram Vilas sipping a cup of tea in a hotel in Panjim along with few of his friends.

“Derekji, welcome we are planning to stage dharna in Old Goa against Baiguinim garbage site,” he said with enthusiasm.

“Arre Ram bhai, you live in Porvorim what is your objection to the Baiguinim site?”

Ram Vilas quickly introduced me to a ragged looking fellow with an overgrown beard and six rings on his fingers. “Derekji meet Pratap from Lucknow. He is top fellow in ideology.” Of course Ram pronounced it as ‘i-doll-g’ but I got the drift.

Pratap slurped tea from a saucer, gave me suspicious glance and then let loose a barrage in pure Hindi, which I could scarcely understand. The only word I took in was ‘Bainguinim’ which he threw in several times for effect. After he had finished he sat down and continued slurping tea as if nothing had happened.

“What did he say?” I asked Ram Vilas.
Ram Vilas did a left-right with his head and said, “Too fast for me, Derekji, but we are going Old Goa to click good photo for Press.”

About a month later I spotted Ram Vilas in a morcha, which was working its way towards the Secretariat. He was panting and gasping as the protestors struggled up the slope after the Mandovi bridge. Ram Vilas looked like he was going to have a heart attack.

“What now?” I asked pulling him aside. It took quite a few minutes for him to catch his breath.

“We …..we …….we want protection for fishermen on beaches,” he said.

“Why are you taking up the cause of fishermen. There are others to do it,” I shouted at him. “You could get a heart attack climbing this slope.”

“This is my new profession, Derekji,” he explained. “If I don’t protest and get picture in newspaper people who give money will ask many questions. Important point is to be there when Press people click photo. Later I make nice book of all photos and newspaper cutting and claim ‘social worker’ status.”

It did not take me long to realize that Ram Vilas was ahead of me in the protest business. He had spotted an opportunity and worked on it. This small chap from Bihar was an entrepreneur in his own right.

Anyway, a month later I spotted Ram Vilas all alone at Miramar beach. He looked sad and forlorn.

“Arre bhai what is your problem? Why the long face?” I asked and squatted next to him.

“Derekji, all issues exhausted,” he explained. “I am thinking of new plan, but tube light fused yaar.”

“What about River Princess?” I said.

“We did protest march on Candolim beach Derekji, he said, “but all protesters took off clothes and went for swim. General secretary Jagdish drowned.”

“It might be worthwhile to protest against mega projects,” I said.

“That also done,” he said sadly.

What about pay parking?” His eyes lit up.

“This is big idea,” exclaimed, “We can start new NGO with new name …….Pay Parking Hatao Munch.” He though for a while and said, “No ‘Munch’ is not nice word. Everybody thinking we are chocolatewallas.”

“What about Samiti or Abhiyan?” I asked. This went on for a while until Ram Vilas settled on Abhiyan. Then with the air of a creative artist he said, “We will demand that government sack commissioner and Mayor …..”

“That’s impossible. The government will not do that,” I explained.

“Derekji,” he said in a hushed tone, “secret of success in protest industry is, make impossible demand because if government accepts demand protest get finished in two days and Ram Vilas become ‘bekhar’ again…….”

With that he stood up and walked away, perhaps to discuss the matter with his tea slurping ‘i-doll-g’ guide.

(ENDS)

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First published in the Gomantak Times (Weekender), Goa - September 6, 2009